WHY LONG-TERM MARRIAGES END IN DIVORCE

When people of any age or stage of life find themselves contemplating divorce, it may be shocking. Couples divorcing later in life after a long-term marriage may face emotions of humiliation, failure, and sadness as a result of their divorce, which is more typically associated with younger individuals.

In recent decades, the divorce rate among senior couples has climbed dramatically. Divorces among spouses over 50 have quadrupled since 1990. Divorces increased among individuals 65 and above, which is perhaps even more unexpected. Why do so many long-term relationships end in divorce?

First, not all divorces in older couples are long-term marriages; some divorces in couples over 50 are second or subsequent marriages, which have long been recognized to be more likely than first marriages to terminate in divorce. However, many elderly couples who are divorcing have been married for twenty, thirty, or even forty years.

REASONS LONG-TERM MARRIAGES END

1. Divorce Has Become More Acceptable.

It's not always true that elderly couples are less pleased in their marriages than prior generations. They may just feel less driven to stay married now than they did previously due to the shame associated with divorce. With divorce becoming more prevalent and accepted over time, more people are finding that the pain of staying in a marriage surpasses the pain of terminating it.

2. The Empty Nest.

After a lengthy marriage, the departure of adult children from the house might lead to divorce. The pair may have noticed their dissatisfaction or problems early in their marriage, but chose to stay together "for the sake of the children." However, once the children have grown up and moved out, such spouses may feel that delaying a divorce is no longer an option. They don't have an option except to address such issues, and they may believe they're too big to overcome.

3. Retirement.

Work, like parenthood, provides many individuals a sense of purpose and structure while also limiting the amount of time they spend with their spouse. After the workday is done, the couple may realize they have lost touch, have grown apart, or just do not like one other's presence.

Retirement may cause an identity crisis and sadness for people who have established their identity on their job rather than their family role. The unexpected frequent presence of the other spouse may feel like an infringement on their routine and space for couples who tended the home while the other spouse worked out of the home. Conflict and divorce can result from one or both of these conditions.

4. Infidelity.

Infidelity in older couples might lead to the dissolution of their marriage. It's sometimes a long-term habit of infidelity that one spouse or the other disregarded while the kids were still at home. Infidelity might be caused by a mid-life crisis, developing incompatibility, or other factors. Infidelity may be just as damaging to an older marriage as it can be to a younger one, if not more so.

5. Illness.

A long-term marriage might be jeopardized by one spouse's illness in a variety of ways. It's possible that one spouse who pledged to marry "in sickness and in health" decides they don't want to take on the responsibility of caring for a terminally ill spouse. After recovering from a catastrophic illness such as cancer or a heart attack, a spouse may realize how fleeting life is and decide that the way they have been living is not how they want to live the rest of their lives. Illness may not be enough to ruin a marriage that is otherwise solid, but it might be a tipping point in one that is already unstable.

6. Simply Growing Apart.

People may just grow apart over the decades of a marriage, which may seem clichéd to remark. They may have shared objectives and ideals in the past, but individuals evolve and change through time, and not usually in the same direction. The rising distance between them may not be able to be overcome without the distractions of children and job, and divorce may be the outcome.

7. Finances and Spending Habits.

Financial concerns, like adultery, may cause problems in relationships at any point. Financial inequalities between spouses might become more obvious as they become older. With stable salaries coming in and the promise of increases on the future, variations in money styles and spending habits may not be as obvious earlier in the marriage when one or both partners are working. 

                                As a couple approaches or enters retirement, one spouse may continue to spend freely as they have in the past, while the other sees the potential of a pleasant retirement dwindling before their eyes. The resulting disagreement may lead to a couple's divorce after decades of marriage.

WHY DIVORCE AFTER LONG-TERM MARRIAGE IS DIFFERENT

Divorce after a long-term marriage might provide some particular challenges. While the majority of older couples do not have to deal with child custody or child support difficulties, other parts of the divorce may be present and more problematic. Older couples often have more assets, such as substantial retirement savings, that must be divided fairly.

For years or decades, one spouse may have been a stay-at-home spouse or homemaker. That spouse is 50 or older (often much older) at the time of the divorce, with minimal capacity to find work and become self-sufficient. As a result, alimony is frequently a topic of discussion.

When it comes to divorce after a long-term marriage, there is a lot on the line. It is critical to have the counsel of an experienced family to ensure that you have all you need to move forward with your life.